healing..

I'm doing this as a way to heal. I know Trav is hurting as much as I am, which is why he won't talk to me. I'm having my DNC Thursday or Friday.. and I'm hoping for Thursday so maybe I won't feel so crummy over the weekend.. it's really the only time i get to spend with T. We are hoping to start trying again in December.. now that God knows we can handle being parents, it'll work out next time. I'm so glad I have my mom, and my friends, and most importantly Trav and the the 2 beautiful kids I can't wait to call my neice and nephew. They both fell asleep on me last night, it was so great that E is finally getting to trust me enough to fall asleep on me. It gives Trav's mom a bit of a break from holding them.. and i love to hold and carry both of them. I even love changing diapers and feeding the Miss Diva Temperance her bottles. This is how i know i'll be a great mom..I just need the chance to have my own!

On a seperate note.. i just figured out i have 35 days until i turn 21! Wow.. I'm getting old!!

I'm pretty tired, so I'm going to lay down..thanks to all who reads this. God Bless!